Has the fear of rejection been stopping you? Here’s a story that will change your perspective!

  

It so happened one day at the basement of Biological Sciences, Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife, underneath a tree, a friend and myself saw a lady (who was our class mate then). She was somehow restless and we were forced to ask what was wrong with her. It happened that she was very thirsty and had no money on her, but then, she saw some fellowship guys carrying bags of sachet water to be used for a fellowship program nearby. She could have asked them for a sachet of water but she was scared that they might decline to her request. The fear of rejection – of hearing a NO – overshadowed the pleasure of having her thirst quenched. She never even considered the slightest possibility of her getting a YES response.

I could have just asked on her behalf but just thought that if the fear of rejection could stop her on something as small as a sachet of water, then it will likely go on to hunt her in even greater issues paramount to her life and happiness. So we decided to help her out. We taught her some basic principles about fear; that FEAR is just an acronym of False Expectations Appearing Real, How fear can take away her happiness if she gives in to it,  that the only way to overcome her fears is to face them. We did all those within a minute or two and thank God those guys with the bags of sachet water  were still within reach.

She took courage and ask courteously and she was given a sachet that she asked for. Out of excitement, she almost jumped on me. She was really grateful to us. You might be wondering that what’s the big deal there? She got excited because she just learnt how to overcome her fears, saved from the paralysis of the fear of rejection. She said she has been standing there for almost like forever and couldn’t get herself to ask.

The reality is that the fear of rejection is something that a lot of of has suffered from and are still suffering from. Even if it’s not on small issues as asking for a sachet of water, it’s mostly on even more important issues.  Many of us have been stopped from aiming higher, trying harder or even reaching farther because of the fear of rejection.

The fact remains that the fear of rejection is something we MUST all learn to overcome if we will ever achieve anything worthwhile.

It’s been proven beyond doubt that the easiest, fastest and surest way to get whatever you want out of life is to ASK. When you ask enough people for whatever you reasonably want, the law of averages will guarantee your success. It will not guarantee that you’ll always get a desirable response everytime you ask, but it will guarantee that you get enough positive response to enable you succeed.  If you can master the techniques of Asking, you’ll take your entire life and career to a whole new level.

Thomas Edison became the world’s greatest inventor with 1093 patents by conducting more failed experiments than anybody else in the world. He failed his way into becoming the greatest inventor in the world.

         

Never expect to succeed the very first time in everything you attempt. If you do not fail some of the time, you are attempting too little and will accomplish nothing worthwhile.

To Your Success & Fulfilment!

Bode Araoye

Life Strategist

Trainer, Coach, & Keynote Speaker on Personal Development

Have you got some problems? If Yes, Congrats!

Source: Have you got some problems? If Yes, Congrats!

Change Your Life with 3 Habits

Change is what we all seek but yet only a few are able to achieve a worthwhile lasting change. John C. Maxwell wrote in one of his books that ‘you will never change your life until you change something you do daily’.

The major difference between successful people and others is that successful people live consciously by habits while others live unconsciously by them. People who succeed do have clarity about their destination and as such develop habits that will get them there.

How do I form an habit? You simply do that by committing to a task on the daily basis. When you are consistent at it, it will become an habit.

Here are three key habits that you need to develop to join the ranks of successful people. The return on investment for the three habits are enormous.

Habit 1 –  Daily Self Evaluation

One way to go about this is to start keeping a personal journal. A life worth living is worth recording. Personal journal will contain how you spend each and every day of your life. This will enable you to be able to to keep track of your life events, keep track of your goals, how your life has been and the direction that your life is heading.

The trick here is that you will not just keep a journal for keeping sake, you will ensure you evaluate yourself daily. This is to be done at night before retiring to bed. It is like a review of how you spend each day, things you did right and the mistakes you made. Always ask yourself, how can I make tomorrow better? It will help you be in control of your decisions and your life.

Habit 2 – Teleological Thinking

This is your ability to consider the longterm consequences of your immediate actions before you embark on them. Every action is a cause set in motion and for every cause, there is a corresponding effect. Being able to consider longterm effects before taking actions will enable you to take actions that are congruent with your goals.

Habit 3 – Daily Accomplishment

I learnt so many years ago from an audio program by John Milton Fogg that accomplishment is made up of three things that if you can do them daily, you will accomplish every day of your life.
Firstly, Always Learn New Things. Learn new things everyday.

Secondly, Always achieve Results. Achieve results everyday whether it is to achieve a goal, add value to others, or make someone feel better.

Thirdly, Always Have Fun. Nothing must deprive you of enjoying your life everyday. What does fun mean to you? Don’t seek out immediate gratification or things that will offer immediate pleasure only to come back to hurt you later. Enjoy what you do and have fun.

If you can Learn a new thing daily, achieve a result daily and have fun daily, you will always accomplish all the days of your life.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an action but a habit”. – Aristotle

The best of readers are those who read and take action based on what they read. I hope this will inspire you to take action towards turning your life into a masterpiece.

To Your Success!

Bode Araoye
Life Strategist
Personal Growth Expert
Business Trainer

In search of Meaning pt3

           Early School Days!

I am now a big baby

At least I have learnt a few things now which meant I wasn’t blank again like I was born

Parents wanted me to go to school
They wanted me to learn how to speak and write

They want me to get comprehensive literacy

I was privileged enough to have such parents that value education

They love me and wanted to give me what they believe was the best legacy – education

I was given the opportunity to go to school
I was enrolled in school, where in their own judgment; I could develop and grow to become someone to reckon with in life

I got all my school needs provided for me by my parents
I must really be a lucky champion I thought

At school, I found myself amidst other students in the custody of great teachers who are available to teach and groom us to become future leaders

I was blessed to be taken to school where I learnt how to work and pray

I began to have friends whom we do play together

Soon I began to see that we would be tested on what we were taught in a form of exam after which some students would receive recognition for their excellent performance

It’s like a form of competition I thought except that winner will not take all while the others will perish

I also desired to be praised and recognized for excellent performance

Since I was born a champion, I must remain a champion

At the time of my early school days, I had begun to learn about life, people and religion both from my parents and at school

In search of Meaning Pt2

        My Precious Gift of Life!

I was finally given the chance to live amongst human

That was when I first showed up on planet earth

Everyone had been expecting me
I never knew they were aware of the fierce competition I heard earlier on

I thought no one was watching when we were racing

Everyone has been waiting for the lucky champion

Amidst warm reception, I was called a baby
Within a week of arrival, people gathered together to give me a winning party
On that faithful day, I was given a name

My earliest days of arrival!
Born into this world, I was as blank as a slate with nothing written on
I was also as pure as a white cloud

I was born with no spoken language, plain mind and no fears
All I had to do in the earliest days of my life was to Adapt
The only thing I could do well was to cry
Anytime I cry, my lovely mum that serves as my vehicle to life was always there to comfort me,

Everybody would want to carry me
Life must be really exciting I felt

Days passed and so were months
I began to have desires too when I began to see other babies running around and playing

I wanted to run and play too but it was not time for that
I had to learn a lot to be able to get to that stage
I had to learn to sit, to crawl, to walk long before I could run and play

I would try and fail but the joy of trying and the desire for running and playing kept me trying till I was able to pass

I soon learnt to pick up the language of my parents
I remembered how excited my parents were when I uttered my first words despite the fact that the words were not correct

The joy of seeing me speak was what excited them

Throughout my earliest days, I had all the care, love and support

I felt at home because I was blessed with a lovely parent